Top 5 Underwhelming Poker Video Games

Seems like virtually every big-name poker star over the last few years has loaned their image to a highly touted poker video game.
Howard Lederer and Anne Duke. Daniel Negreanu and Jennifer Harman. Phil Laak and Antonio Esfandiari. Greg Raymer, Clonie Gowen, Erick Lindgren, Carlos Mortenson. Jesus. Even Paul Darden.
And while those might be the most recognizable names, they're certainly not the only ones. Turns out a few other players have given it a go, with somewhat, umm, less success juice cards.
These are them (and their accompanying jacket blurb):
1) Bill Chen's Marginal Statistical Edge
"Welcome to the pulse-pounding world of quantitative analytics, Bill Chen-style!
"Longtime member of the rec.gambling.poker newsgroup, software designer and coauthor of The Mathematics of Poker, Chen plays host to this madcap romp through the underlying math of poker, applying the 'Chen Formula' to push your marginal statistical edge.
"Just a sample of the excitement: Take the high card and score it. A=10, K=8, Q=7, J=6 and 10 to 2 = 1/2 the value of the card (a 6 is worth 3, for example). If the 2nd card pairs the first, then the value is either twice the high card point or 5, whichever is greater. Round any half-points up....
"And there's more. But the most important part, as Chen likes to say when he's a little tipsy and introducing his next karaoke song: 'If you're not living on the marginal statistical edge, you're taking up too much space...'"

Rules man.

2) David Singer's Rules Infraction
"Anybody can luckbox their way to a tournament win. But how many of you have truly felt the thrill of declaring an opponent's hand dead based on an obscure rules infraction?
Ever sent someone on a 10-minute penalty? Made a sloppy dealer question their career choice? Rules nits take notice: here comes David Singer's Rules Infraction..."
3) Vanessa Rousso's Aggressive Call
"The setup: You get moved to a new table with $12,000 in chips. You're there less than 10 hands when you get dealt A-Js on the button (six-handed tournament by the way). Action checks to the short-stack cut-off who raises to $600 ($100/$200 blinds). You call.

Vanessa Rousso: Aggressive caller.

Aggressive big stack in the big blind re-raises to $2,000 (important note... this player did this several times before in only the last 10 hands; either he was being hit with the deck or he was steamrolling with his $25k+ stack when average stack was only $6k or so, so he can't be given too much credit).
Small stack pushes all-in for $2,150 (which means if you call the big-blind big stack can't re-raise because $150 is not considered an actual raise).
What do you do? You make the AGGRESSIVE CALL..."

Got stuff to do.

4) Joe Sebok's Day 1 Chip Leader
"Your mission: Accumulate chips fast and furious on your way to the Day 1 chip lead, making yourself a heavy favorite to make the final table - if not to win it all infrared ink.
Your next challenge - fritter it all away as fast as possible before another embarrassing bust-out on the bubble.
This is Joe Sebok's Day 1 Chip Leader - where the final table just keeps you from other stuff you need to do."

Birdguts.

5) Gavin "Birdguts" Smith's Duck Hunt
Not so much a video game actually. You just get drunk and shoot at birds off your porch. But it could be a video game.
Note: These unfortunately don't actually exist. Yet.